The father of Vice President Joe Biden’s used to managed dealerships in Delaware. Most of them were for GM cars and he ran a Chrysler operation for a while. He also sold Ford vehicles in Wilmington, Delaware. Some of the cars that Joe Biden has bought in the past includes a ’51 Studebaker, a ’56 Chevy in college, a 100,000-mile Mercedes 190SL, and a 1967 Goodwood-green Corvette.
In an interview with Car and Driver from October 2011, Joe Biden answered a question about parody news website The Onion featuring an article where Joe Biden was shirtless and washing a Pontiac Trans Am. So Ole Joe never had a Trans Am, but that is not stopping an Indiegogo from going viral to buy him one. The campaign has 47 days left and so far $4,850 has been raised out of the $25,000 goal to buy Joe Biden a Trans Am as of the time I was writing this. More details are after the jump:
Joe Biden loved his Trans Am. As soon as it reached about 40 degrees in Scranton, PA, Ole Joe would pull the cover off of his beloved beauty and spend hours detailing her immaculate curves. He’d often be overheard murmuring how sweet his,”Bird” was which was completely opposite to his normally gruff demeanor. It also made certain Senate Foreign Relations Committee meetings very awkward.
Senator Biden, now Vice President Biden, has always been known for his fiery and passionate speech and mannerisms. But when he looked at the Bird, he’d hitch up his jorts, rip off of his shirt sleeves and chug a sixer of Ice House.
It was love.
Then came the Great Recession. Biden tried to maintain his Trans AM through 2009, but with the soaring gas prices and the Republican pressure to destroy everything that was General Motors, he was unable to do so. He ended up selling her to a young man about to go to war in Iraq. There were tears in his eyes when he gave the Bird away, but he knew she would be in a better place.
Unfortunately, not everything on the internet is true, no matter what the internet tries to tell you. Over the past four years one of the internet’s favorite political meme’s is of “Uncle Joe Biden.” It started with an Onion article (http://www.theonion.com/articles/shirtless-biden-washes-trans-am-in-white-house-dri,2718/) which poked fun at the Vice President because of his blue collar mannerisms and forthright speech when discussing…well…anything.
Joe Biden has made a career about speaking what he means, regardless if it is in his best political interest or if it is the “politically correct” thing to say. Because of this he endures jokes regarding his “gaffes” and verbal miscues and America (and some of the rest of the world) laugh and chuckle about this homer Vice President of ours.
All the while, Joe Biden has calmly and quietly been an incredible Vice President. He was one of the first politicians to publicly embrace gay marriage (http://articles.latimes.com/2012/may/06/nation/la-na-biden-gay-marriage-20120507) and may have been personally responsible for President Obama coming out in favor of gay marriage and the subsequent change in the Democratic Party’s platform. He is also a stunningly intelligent politician who understands the nuance of foreign and domestic policy. He is also not afraid to show disdain for factually deficient arguments.
In order to let Vice President Biden know just how much we appreciate him, while also making a very silly part of the internet come true (we are the internet after all), let’s buy Uncle Joe a Trans Am like the one that is featured in the Onion article linked to above.
Vice President Biden knows about this meme and finds it “hilarious.” (http://voices.washingtonpost.com/44/2011/01/biden-onion-spoof-is-hilarious.html). Let’s make it even funnier, more awesome, and gosh darnit, give us another thing to talk about about in addition to the cat pictures and rage comics.
Now, Uncle Joe won’t be able to accept this behemoth of steely American grace and power. He has these pesky laws and regulations and political-y things to deal with. Take into consideration his magnanimity and power of personality, he probably wouldn’t be able to drive the Trans AM without causing a mass outpouring of Conservative Tears.
That being said, the internet will still purchase the car and auction it off for charity. All proceeds will be distributed to the Biden Breast Health Initiative, Doctors Without Borders, the Wounded Warrior Project and GLAAD.
Maybe if we ask nicely, Joe Biden will wash it on the White House lawn.